Each section of this website is a chapter. Reading only one section without the others, doesn’t tell you the complete story.
One thing about the Enigma, that is behind the music, is that the lyrics in old songs took on new meaning…and Gilmour himself said that the old songs mean even more today.
(The song ‘” Sorrow” was written and composed by David Gilmour. It was released in September 1987. Gilmour has stated that although lyrics are not his strong point, the song is one of his strongest lyrical efforts, even though the opening lines were from John Steinbeck’s “Grapes of Wrath”.
“Sorrow was a poem I’d written as a lyric before I wrote music to it, which is rare for me”)
The sweet smell of a great sorrow lies over the land
Plumes of smoke rise and merge into the leaden sky
A man lies and dreams of green fields and rivers
But awakes to a morning with no reason for waking
He’s haunted by the memory of a lost paradise
In his youth or a dream, he can’t be precise
He’s chained forever to a world that’s departed
It’s not enough, it’s not enough
His blood has frozen and curdled with fright
His knees have trembled and given way in the night
His hand has weakened at the moment of truth
His step has faltered
One world, one soul
Time pass, the river rolls
And he talks to the river of lost love and dedication
And silent replies that swirl invitation
Flow dark and troubled to an oily sea
A grim intimation of what is to be
There’s an unceasing wind that blows through this night
And there’s dust in my eyes, that blinds my sight
And silence that speaks so much louder than words
Of promises broken.
Watch Pink Floyd “Sorrow” from 1994. https://youtu.be/8Q7I5tKrtW8 See Gilmour’s reactions. They will become very obvious to anyone who knows the story. It’s an incredibly powerful song and performance.
He may not be able to say much about the Enigma, for obvious reasons, but with music and attitude he speaks very clearly. See his anger during certain lyrics and then see his smile after the ‘columns’ clue goes up on the screen, like the lyrics in the song “Plumes of smoke rise and merge into the leaden sky. He is angrily talking to and about Carl Palmer, Sting, Jon Anderson and others for using love songs and romantic imagery to cause serious emotional distress and trying to push me to suicide. The song just so happens to describe Carl so well. Gilmour shows anger at the word “hand” during “His hand has weakened at the moment of truth”. Carl was born in Handsworth UK and his hands are his life. TDB gave me the truth about him and I’m telling it. A sweet smell of a great sorrow” here it means “the sweet sound of a great sorrow are lies heard over the land”. Love songs were lies and they were heard all over the world.
There are also the ‘ruins’ clues in the Take it Back video, which are pictured below.
Ruins and columns are big clues. They refer to the ruins and columns in the ELP “Welcome Back” video that I’m in, where ELP uses the theme of Romeo & Juliet. They perform in Verona Italy and Greg lake stands on the so called ‘Juliet balcony’ in Verona.
On their 1992 Black Moon album is the instrumental “Romeo and Juliet”.
While I was “wearing the inside out” during 1992 and 93, I thought about Romeo and Juliet and some similarities. During my times with Carl in the early 70’s, I’d act out parts from the movie with him like “and palm to palm is holy palmer’s kiss”. I had very long hair and Carl resembled the actor Leonard Whiting who played Romeo in the ’68 Franco Zeffirelli version. He knew he looked like the character, wearing a hairstyle and costumes that were similar.
So there I was in 1993 thinking about Carl and realizing it had been 20 years since I’d seen him.. ”Tis twenty years till then” Juliet said. And I thought “O Romeo wherefore art though”…where was Carl and why wouldn’t he talk to me.
I thought about committing suicide because it was all so tragic and I couldn’t be with him again. I thought I would act out the suicide scene like the other scenes I did years ago..Thinking that all those years he cared and I didn’t know. But it wasn’t true. Carl never cared for me, he used me for his image. Then when he couldn’t blackmail me with photos, I ran out not knowing that I was taking his secret with me, a secret I finally realized, that could hurt his career. (See 11:11 chapter) But with the help of the clues and lyrics of The Division Bell songs and artwork, I’m better able to be believed and tell the story.
So you see David Gilmour is helping me with music to “Take it Back”. To tell everything Carl and others did with their music, videos and bizarre behavior. I dont think I realized at that time that there were columns or pillars in Juliets tomb. She stabs herself against a pillar. And in the Welcome Back video there is a skull between the pillars behind the band. And the camera kept zooming in on it until it got huge. Just saw that recently and it was so creepy. Well that’s what they hoped that I would do. So terribly sad.
A much more powerful performance than 1994, is the 2016 Pompeii “Sorrow”
“His blood has frozen and curdled with fright
His knees have trembled and given way in the night
His hand has weakened at the moment of truth
His step has faltered”
Because I’m taking it back and telling what they did..
During “Sorrow” in Pompeii 2016… Is that another clue I just found? The lighting effects look like Pillars in the smoke, just like they did in 1994.
“C’est la vie” stands for Say Denise. They obviously couldn’t say my name. It’s sad all these love songs and nobody loved me. I’ve got nothing to brag about there. In 1992 when I saw myself in the Welcome Back video and heard the new song “Affairs of the Heart”, I went back in the past to see if there were other songs and I found that one and believed in the love. But The Division Bell told me the truth.
“Have your leaves all turned to brown will you scatter them around you?” Leaves represent newspaper clippings of Carl that I had collected in 71 – 73 that I would scatter around me but with time in 77 they should have turned brown. Actually in 73 when I left, I threw them in the garbage, but I did toss them in the air like leaves beforehand.
“Do you love and then how am I to know, if you don’t let your love show for me”
I never told him I loved him, I thought it was obvious. And after the horrible camera incident in December of 1973 (read the Unwelcome Back Section) I didn’t come back
and didn’t show up at any concerts again. Not until 20 years later when I figured out what was going on. I believed it was love, but it was all a lie.
“Like the sea there’s a love too deep to show. Took a storm before my love flowed for you” telling me that he cared, but didn’t show it. Then I stormed off and left because of a horrible incident. Because of those lyrics, I thought he finally realized that he loved me. A lie.
Greg wrote and sang the songs. He’d hang around us sometime and I always wondered what he wanted. But the Division Bell told me that Carl was “hanging himself on someone else’s words, dying to believe in what he heard. But I was “starring straight into the shining sun”. One of the pictures I sent him in ’92 and ’93 with my letters, is one of myself with my infant son. I was squinting looking into the sun. I got married in January of 1977. And I was happy.
It’s still unknown to me exactly how my letters and pictures got into the hands of David Gilmour. They could have been handed over with the agreement they not be used against Carl, but they were. And they were used to help me against Carl instead. That’s most likely the main reason Gilmour can’t say anything obvious and clues have to be so obscure. There must have been a written agreement.
“Like a song out of tune and out of time, all I needed was a rhyme for you C’est la vie”. As I wrote above, C’est la vie is a rhyme for say Denise, my name. All they needed was a song and I’d come back. But I didn’t get the message until ’93.
On some of the songs Pete Sinfield is listed as cowriter. As if Greg wasn’t a good enough writer, yeah right.
So, if I ever talked about the songs to others, they could always say Pete wrote that part. They were protecting themselves. I did think if anyone really cared, they’d say my name and write the song themselves. That part always made me think something wasn’t right.
While writing and recalling events, I stumble upon more sad things that ELP did. They made a documentary of their time in Verona and they put the 1992 song “Affairs of the Heart” in it. (See my section titled “Dangerous, Irresistible pastime”.) There, I tell how that song tells how I met Carl and how I left. When I heard it after 20 years, I thought he loved me all that time and that I never knew it. But the song is a lie, he never cared for me and he wanted me out of the way because I know too much.
When you read about the sadness and emotional distress and all the other crazy things they did, it shouldn’t be a shock that Pink Floyd would write an album and give clues to help me be believed and get justice. I was up against some powerful people by myself. But Pink Floyd are much bigger and they helped me to tell it like I’m doing here.
If only the fans supported me more and the media would listen to me when I try to tell it. What is even sadder is that some people actually think I’m the crazy one. That’s exactly what they wanted in the first place, that way no one would believe me and I’d get more emotional. I’m just telling the crazy things that some musicians did and that other musicians helped me and are still helping me. I made it through a horrible thing and I’m very strong minded and brave to be here telling it today. I’m not a writer, but I have to try and tell it the best I can.
The clues I’m given must be very vague. Pink Floyd and friends have to be careful what they say because I’m telling a big story about other legendary musicians, things they don’t want known. I have to be the one to tell it first to get justice. Musicians are waiting for me to get this in the media, but I haven’t had luck yet. I think publishers are afraid to print it. So all I can do for now is make sure I “Keep Talking” and “Take it Back”..
Don’t know if anyone noticed and I don’t know much about guitars, but Gilmour switched guitars for “Sorrow”. He always played the red and white, but he started playing the black strat on “Sorrow” in 2015. He also plays it in “Sorrow” in Pompeii. See video way above.